Master the fine art of textual intercourse

So she’s been messaging you and you have been messaging her back. Wonder what’s really going on in her mind? Decode her here.

L - Think of me as special.

If she signs her initial, she’s trying to work out how much you like her. She reckons you know loads of girls with the initial ‘L’ but hopes this ‘L’ will stand out.

. (Period) - Stop thinking of me, or I’ll call the police.

A full stop might mean that she’s telling you, “Don’t even think about it, I’m way out of your league”. Or perhaps, it just means that she’s very particular about her commas and full stops. Don’t worry, she’d only have corrected your punctuation for the rest of the relationship.

X - You are nice, I like you.

For the uninitiated, ‘x’ in short messaging lingo stands for a kiss. Don’t start jumping about and whooping for joy yet, though. Most women will add one ‘x’ to just about every text message that they send out, regardless of who it’s being actually sent to. While it’s tempting, don’t read too much into it.

XXXXXX - You’re nice, I’m a bunny-boiler. And I’m actually hiding outside your door.

So many kisses could mean only one thing. She wants you badly, you’re the one, you are the one! The one that she wants to hack up and keep in her freezer! She’s obsessed with you, maybe just a little too much. Be afraid, be very afraid.